Its official we are moving! I happy about it but now I feel like I have so much on my plate… maybe to much i don’t know. I love my family but were not close like we used to be, there are a lot of reasons but i don’t feel like going into it right now. Here is my agenda from today until moving day… We turned in our adoption application today along with $700 for the next step (very exciting were getting closer!!!) We have an adoption class on the 19th from 8am - 1pm and then we have another one on the 26th same times and we also move that day we will probably start moving around 2 or 3. We need to get as much packed up between now and then, pretty much everything we can live with out for the next 2 weeks will be boxed up and sent to our storage unit so we can get the carpets cleaned and have everything looking nice so we can have some people look at it so hopefully we can get it rented out right away. Plus this whole week johnny has worked 12 hour shifts from 3pm to 3am and so all week we haven’t really had time to just chill together, we haven’t really sat down and had a meal together all week. And now at my church there is a ladies day which is all well and good but with all of the stuff to do (plus i have loads of stuff for good will which will be going tomorrow) and id like to spend a little while with my husband this week… my moms pushing me to go she even said i never do anything for her so i could at least go… i said excuse me what about me going over and helping (aka doing about 80% of the work) her clean out the garage and she says well i paid you, and thats true but i told her i never said you had to or asked you to and when you offered i needed some money so i was like ok cool… but that wasn’t my intention or motivation. plus i do other things for her. She got annoyed with me but that thing is from 8am to 12pm and i still need to make a trip to the good will take stuff to storage (which will be a chore since its a friggin mess right now) we need to paint the hallway and also spend time together. maybe i could do it all but i don’t want to feel like i cant get it all done so i don’t know… she kept saying that people would help us move but that isn’t the problem, we have to get down to it and really pick and choose which of our possessions are actually worth moving and that really isn’t anything other people can help with plus if we cant get it rented out then we have to pay 2 rents and we cant do that and we dot have a lot of time to move and fix this mess up and it needs a lot done…

We might be moving, we would like to anyway. Right now we cant get a house and so we are looking at apartments. There was a fight between 2 of my neighbors and one fired a gun into the air and threatened to kill them etc… then 2 nights later a store just down the street (about 5 minutes walking and 30 seconds in the car) was robbed and the neighbors right next to me are rude pot smoking loud mouth punks who light loud fireworks all hours of the night play their music really loud whenever they want and don’t give a crap about any one. Plus since we will be most likely adopting a black baby i know there are some hicks around here who are pregidist and 2 places have confederate flags out etc and who knows about the neighbors… I want to adopt our child feeling safe where i live and know that no matter what color my child is they will be safe and not mistreated. i can just hear the ignorant fool on the other side who gossips “hey did y’all hear ’bout the girl on the other side with the nigger baby” I have heard them say stuff like that and there is a girl in this park that is black shes light but you can tell she is a little and they say things. and if i heard that you know i would slap the ignorant right out their mouth! I cant stand that kind of people I think that black people are beautiful and so is any other color and whatever race you are you should be proud of your heritage but not so proud that you think your better than others. I want to move somewhere that these things are a lot less likely and I know there is a “risk” that adopting a child from another race may put me in a situation like the one stated above maybe that cant be removed completely but it can be decreased. I don’t care if people say anything about me and already a few people have but what makes me sad is that people would make any kind of statement about an innocent baby, thats just sickening!

we looked at a bunch of apartments yesterday and found a big fancy one for a reasonable price that we would love to get were just waiting to see if our application will be approved and if so we will be moving in in like 2 weeks either way weather we move there or not we plan on moving which im honestly excited about because this area is bad and i have hated it from day one and so getting out of here would be great! The only negative is that is up stairs and thats never fun moving a washer, dryer and other big stuff but im sure we can do it. Being up-stairs has its positives too though the steps go only to our doorway so its a little more private, and no one above us making noise.

It kind of sucks though because if we move we will miss our adoption classes and so everything gets pushed back a month but then i guess thats time to get settled in so whatever… I just want to get to the point where we find our baby and can ge on with our lives together as a family.

I peeked online at the new close to my heart summer catalog and they have a stamp set thats adoption themed I was so excited when I say it because i haven’t been able to find anything for scrapbooking that was adoption themed so this is perfect!!!